I am not special and neither are you

I am not special and neither are you

I am not special. I believed I deserved extraordinary treatment not only from life but from people too. It stemmed from the idea ingrained in us, right from our infancy. By our caregivers, we are ‘special snowflakes.’ All very distinct and peculiar. These very words created a sense of almost vanity. Close to 8 billion individuals on this planet and we are significant? Who are we indeed kidding?

I was always snobbish about the way I spoke, the expressions I use, the personality I carried, the sense of humor I had, my thoughts, my values, ideals, and dreams. All that made me feel as if, even though they weren’t the greatest in the world. They were mine, and that no other human had even a speck of my traits in them. Adding fuel to the fire are the countless posts on social media. Telling you how uncommon and noteworthy you are, and that you need to own it, embrace it, and be proud of it. Only made my narcissistic tendencies shoot higher.

It was as if I made a cave my home. If I didn’t venture out in the world and continued living in the bubble of my presumptuousness. My vanity would have blinded me. Almost to the point of being foolish. When I went out of my cave it was uncomfortable, unsettling, and unpleasant. To see all the traits I held as my exclusive priced possession with more than dozens of people. Some who had it in a more refined manner. My image of a special snowflake melted. I could now look past the point of being significant at large. I now saw myself being symbolic in the lives of those who I touched.

So, if for a second, if you feel that the person you are right now in this moment is special from the rest of the world then, please know that you haven’t known the world. I haven’t seen the world either, but enough to break my vanity and make me accept that I indeed am not rare.

It was a startling discovery to come to terms that I in fact wasn’t a snowflake but a drop in the wide ocean like one of the many. Yet that doesn’t mean that I am insignificant. I’m a part of something bigger than myself. I’m a part of the lives of people I hold close.

We aren’t born with the entitlement of having all the luxuries of life; love, luck, comfort, assurance, and support. We build these throughout our lifetime, some better than others. I have come to terms. I don’t deserve any treatment that is superior to anyone else. That things in life will be unfair. That I will catch myself saying “why me” an infinite amount of times. That fate won’t always favour me. That I may not be seen as important for the majority of the residents of this planet. That I won’t be impactful or remembered when I am dead. And that is completely alright. I have found something much more worthwhile instead, to forge connections that create a special, unique, remarkable, and momentous moment for us. A special moment for two not-so-special-people. Truly, that is something I will always be proud of.

You are not loved because you are special. You are special because you are loved.